The Jewish Eye
We Should All Be Such Good Husbands!
"Although it is customary to ask forgiveness from one who has died," R' Shlomo Zalman Auerbach said at his wife's funeral, "I shall not do so. Throughout our entire marriage we never offended or hurt one another. We conducted our lives according to the Shulchan Aruch, and I have no reason to ask her forgiveness."
The following is an example of R' Auerbach's exquisite sensitivity towards his wife combined with his exactitude in fulfilling the Shulchan Aruch. R' Yitzchak Yerucham Borodiansky told this story in one of the eulogies during the shivah week.
Once, R' Shlomo Zalman's sister came to his house to ask about a certain bachur who was suggested as prospective match for her daughter. When she first entered the house, there were a few people waiting to speak to R' Shlomo Zalman. She waited until they left, and finally she was alone with R' Shlomo Zalman and his Rebbitzen. She asked him about the bachur, and he answered, "He's a fine boy."
When R' Shlomo Zalman' sister was about to leave, he asked her if she was planning on visiting their sister in Sharei Chessed before she went home and she answered in the affirmative. Later, when she left the house of their sister, she found R' Shlomo Zalman waiting outside. He approached her and said, |"Regarding the bachur, you should know that you should only ask about others in privacy." "But who was there?" she said. "The Rebbitzen was there," he said, "and she doesn't need to hear loshon hara." Then he told her, "Don't follow through with this shidduch. He's not for your daughter."
R' Shlomo Zalman felt responsible to convey the proper information to his sister, but he was so sensitive to his rebbitzen's feelings that he didn't even want to ask her to leave the room. Instead, he used his precious time to meet his sister in another location, saving his wife from hearing loshon hara and from being insulted! (Source: The Man of Truth and Peace)
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