Finding Your Bashert
Strategies for Success
By Shani Stein
The Judaica Press: 1999
Reviewed by Simon Bonim - January 12, 2009
Let's face it. The shidduch process is a difficult period in everyone's life. It can be a time of great stress and worry, but also a time of joy, wonder, and self-discovery - you also get to meet a whole lot of people that you might otherwise have never met! In Finding Your Bashert: Strategies for Success, Shani Stein offers time-tested tips and strategies for seasoned daters and their parents. Her advice will help you to refine your goals, reduce your stress levels, and actually have fun on your dates!
Stein is also the author of the much acclaimed book The Survival Guide to Shidduchim, which is geared more for those new to the shidduch scene. Finding Your Bashert picks up where the Survival Guide left off, delving deeper into the shidduch system and touching upon numerous topics not covered in her first book.
In Finding Your Bashert, Stein helps you to discover just what it is that is keeping you from getting married, how to dress for 'success', where and how to find a good 'date', working with a shadchan (matchmaker), handling rejection, the emotional differences between men and women, getting the best out of your 'unmarried' years, do's and don'ts for parents, and many other important topics. In addition, throughout this book, Stein has included handy 'action steps'. These are lists of steps that will help you put her advice into practice.
In writing this book, Stein has drawn deeply from her own dating experiences within the Frum (religious) dating scene, those of her friends and family members, and has included sage advice from Shidduch professionals. If you are serious about finding your Bashert (predestined soul mate) and getting married, you will find the advice and tips in this book to be invaluable. Stein's writing style is open and honest, her advice practical and beneficial, and you'll find that whether you are frum or not, this book is an essential guide to Jewish dating and finding your perfect mate!
A Hedge of Roses, by Norman Lamm.
Jewish Insights into Marriage and Married Life. A book on Jewish family purity laws (Taharat ha-mishpahah) and the spiritual aspects of a Jewish marriage.
The Jew and His Home, by Eliyahu Kitov.
This is a perfect guide book for those seeking an introduction to Torah Observant family life, as well as a reference guide for students, newlyweds, and anyone seeking to learn more about one of the most important tenants of Judaism - Jewish Family life.